Silence is golden

...unless you are waiting for an NHS hearing aid.

Swingers R Us

Another advert that caught my eye whilst in Berlin recently was the following:

"Small group meets every 3 weeks for board games, eat, drink and socialise."

Why do I get the feeling that it should have also said ".....must be broad minded and be prepared to throw car keys into a pot for random excitement."

'X' marks the spot

Some kind fellow has spray painted a yellow cross where I normally stand on the railway platform. No doubt to tell me where to stand lest I forget (given that I've been standing there every morning for the past 4 years)........or is it because they need to replace an unstable slab?

I can but hope!

Honesty is the best policy

Whilst in Berlin recently I happened upon the following advert in the main English language magazine:

"You are female, couple or group of females and want to have vacation in Greece. I will have sex with the females and will accomodate you in 5 places. Interested?".

I would love to know how successful this honest approach is!

I'm incommunicado....which is a village just outside Lisbon

Fun game for the train - number 52

Try turning the "Bluetooth" mode on whilst you are on the train and search for other handsets. Once you've got all of the entries and have ignored "Nokia 6500", "BlackBerry Pearl" and "I am C3-PO human-cyborg relations" you can laugh out loud at the names people have chosen for their 21st century communication devices. I particularly like looking round the carriage for the owners of "Pete likes arse", "Hugh G Rection" and "Studeley Goodbang", because you can tell them a mile away!

That said, when you're in a carriage full of men and you realise someone has named their phone "*xx* barbie *xx*" you really do wonder what the world is coming to!

Lost and found

Senility happens to us all eventually but I found it particularly sad earlier in the week when my father picked me up from the airport. He dutifully parked in the car park, came to arrivals to meet me and by the time we had got back to the car park (approximately 5 minutes later) he had forgotten where he had parked. It then took us another 20 minutes to find the car which resulted in a charge of £2.40 to get out!

Big jugs!

I had an interesting walk yesterday evening along the canals in Amsterdam with my boss and my bosses boss who happened to be a local.

Having not visited this great old city since a geography field trip when I was 15, I was saddened by how many more women had to warm themselves in the windows of their tiny tenements under red heat lamps. The poor souls.

That said, I learnt a lot about the value of property and what you get for your euro, and here are three examples I came across (each had a number so I could instantly recall them!). Flat 34A was first up and rather small and unimaginatively upholstered. 36C was slightly more rounded but craved ambient lighting to make it really work and lastly there was 38DD which needed some TLC and would be a handful even if you just used it as a weekend retreat...