Spotting them a mile off

We walked to a local town yesterday and had lunch in a pub well renowned for being part of a chain that sells cheap food and beer. We know what to expect when we go there and are rarely disappointed - no frills, but 'it does what it says on the tin'.

Now, the place is usually frequented by a veritable smorgasbord of people, and yesterday was no exception. Opposite us were a table of 8 - they were loud, the blokes were wearing cheap trousers (no matching jackets obviously) and cracking humourless crude jokes and the women were either old, fat or a mixture of both...and of course everyone was wearing more gold jewellery than you could find in a flea market.

I turned to my wife at one point and rolled my eyes and said "I wonder which department of the local council they work for" as a bit of a joke...only for my wife to say "They're from the planning department, as I overheard them talking about an application for an extension they've just turned down".

How often real life mirrors comedy.

Herbal remedies

Having tried cough mixture, pain killers and various roots from the garden, I finally realised that the best thing to rid a cold was brandy, mixed with wine and vodka! Oh happy times.

Thinking man

It's a sad day when you sit there alone and ponder whether the advantages of using bamboo scaffolding over metal outweigh the hassle of trying to source the damn stuff in the first place.

Tis the season to be stupid

After weeks of counting down the days until I could open my advent calendar, I promptly forgot this morning and went without my little chocolate gift. On the bright side it means I get two chocolates tomorrow.....assuming my wife hasn't already had mine that is!