Slip, slap, slop!

Ok so the weekend was really hot. Beautiful sunny days and the chance to sit in the garden.

But when I reclined on the deck chair and closed my eyes, all I could think about was that we are 93 million miles away from the sun.....and if it feels this hot on earth, imagine how bloody hot it would be if you were a bit closer!

I began to panic about which sun factor cream I would have to buy if I was a space tourist.

Vegetable power

Driving along a fairly busy 'A' road recently, I saw a sign that read 'Fresh Asparagus - 250 yards on your right'. Now I might be wrong, but I've never seen Asparagus as much of an impulse buy, and I'm not aware that you can use it instead of petrol, diesel, gas or indeed electricity to run your car.

I can only hope that they don't have fields of the stuff, or the EU will have another 'mountain' on its hands fairly soon.

Count the rings III

Yet more signs that show you're getting old:

- varifocal or reactolite glasses sound fun
- you start ironing your pyjamas
- you do the washing up to save on dishwasher tablets

The Bank of Knotty Ash

It's not every morning that you walk past a bank and see a man going in with a feather duster! At 6.42am it was definitely too early for a stick up, so I can only assume he was making the plastic plants look more life-like or he was doing impressions of Ken Dodd. If the latter, I do hope CCTV footage of this exists and can be posted on the interweb soon.

Moving the goalposts

I saw a job advertised the other day which said "Chief Operating Officer - North Africa, negotiable", so I negotiated and managed to get it changed to East Sussex.