Calm? Do I look like I'm calm???

You know when you've got a creative imagination when you see a sign saying "Traffic Calming Measures Now In Place" and mentally see images of angels gently stroking the bonnets of all manner of het up cars and vans. Mmmm, I can almost hear the sound of soothing classical music wafting over the carriageway to wipe away the road-rage of our vehicular cousins!